ThefirsttimeIsawhim,Iwasthteosayanythingandtooawestrucktotouchhim.Hewasnotafreakoradevil,butperfeeveryway,abeautifulboy.Afterthelongwaittomeethim,Ifoundmyselfoverebythesuddenge,notsomuchhisphysicalpresence,hisarrivalafterbeinghiddenaway,butthegeiosomethingmoresublimelyhuman.TesssmiledatmyfusionandthelookinmyeyesasIbeheldhim.

    "Youwontbreakhim,"shesaid.

    Myson.Ourchild.Tenfientoes.Goodcreatlungs,anaturalatthebreast.Iheldhiminmyarmsandrememberedthetwinsintheirmatgyellowjumpers,mymingtomeasshescrubbedmybathebathtub,myfatherholdingmyhandwhenweclimbedthebleachersatanautumnfootballgame.ThenIrememberedClara,myfirstmother,howIlovedtocrawluhebillowsofherskirts,andthestofwitchhazelonmyfatherAbramscheek,hisfeatherymoustacheashepressedhislipsagainstmyskin.Ikissedourboyandsideredtheordinarymiracleofbirth,thewonderofmywife,andwasgratefulforthehumanchild.

    WenamedhimEdward,ahrived.BorntwoweeksbeforeChristmas1970,hebecameourdarlingboy,ahosefirstfewmonths,thethreeofussettledintothehousethatMomandCharliehadboughtforusinthenewdevelopmentupinthewoods.Atfirst,Icouldhethoughtoflivingthere,buttheysurprisedusonoursedanniversary,andwithTesspregnantandthebillsmounting,Icouldnotsayno.Thehousewaslargerthanweneeded,especiallybeforethebabycame,andIbuiltasmallstudio,movingintheoldpiano.ItaughtmusictoseventhgradersandraudentorchestraatMarkTwainMiddleSchool,andintheeveningsandonweekends,whenIdidnthavetomindthebaby,Iworkedonmymusic,dreamingofapositionthatevokedtheflowofonelifei