THENEWYORKERFIbyDorisLessingJanuary21,1956

    Nowadays,wheypeswhoflushgrouseorworksalmon(Ithinkthesearethecorrectterms),Imoreoftenthannotbeheardsaving,“Allthesame,food,spivemeaflockofguineafowlinopentry.”Fromthere,Ipassontocasualmentionofthehigherfauna—deerandlions,andsoon—andinnotimethemosthardenedsportsmenareoozingenvyofwhatsoundslikeagirlhoodspentoualsafari.Ikeepthetruthtomyself.

    NotthatIhaven’tseenlions.Ihaveenteredthem,andotheriinganimals,intheLondonZoo,whereIgotolookatthemfromtimetotime.Andonmyhomeground,whichisMashonaland,SouthernRhodesia,faunaofeverykioflourishand,forallIknow,flourishyet.Idonotcare.Ineverdid.

    Alongwithmyindiffereandlittlegamegoesthefactthatthiswholeplexislinkedirretrievablywithmysiblingrivalry(formybrother)andmymaseprotest(againstpracticallyeverything).Itallstartedvery,early,whenmybrivena.22rifle—Butperhapsitwouldbebesttogoevenfurtherback,tohisbicycle,whichherodeperfectlyatthefirstattempt,whereasIcouldonlylookatitandshudderwithfear.Idecideditwasnotbeingfirltorideaboy’sbicycle,andstuckoutforoneofmyown,knowingfullwellthatthestateofthefamily’sfinanceswouldputofftheevilhourindefinitely.

    Inthelightofthisdiscreditableandevasivebehavior,itiseasytouandpenedwhenthe.22rifleappeared,duringoneofmybrother’sholidaysfromschool.Hepickeditup,tookaimatasmallbirdsittingonatwigahundredyardsaway,judiciouslypressedthetrigger,andthebirdfelldead.Irememberhefeltbadbecausetheshothadnotgohroughtheeye.Tohim,therefore,sportimmediatelytookonitsproperco